The Command of Love
by Jennifer Conner
My husband and I attended a wedding last night. One of my co-workers was marrying her childhood sweatheart. Both have been married previously but the groom’s wife passed away last year and the bride has been divorced for some years. They met when the bride was 15 years old and 47 years have passed since then. Can you imagine reconnecting with a love from your teenage years? I pray that they will find great happiness together.
As the pastor was presiding over the ceremony, he said something that struck me. “Love each other. Why do we have to tell couples to love each other? Maybe it is because sometimes we are unloveable.” So true! There are times when I don’t even like my husband so the act of loving him isn’t even a thought in my mind.
In today’s world, where divorce is as easy as changing your underwear, there are many couples who are opting for this “easy” way out of loving their spouse. When emotions and tempers run hot, most times you want to be separated from the person who causes you great pain. There are some studies that say that couples who lived together prior to marriage have a lower divorce rate than those who didn’t. I'm not sure if I'm sold on this conclusion.
You would think that if a couple made it down the aisle after shacking-up that they learned to resolve any issues before the "I do's", right? Maybe in theory, but I believe that in reality, we often see marriage as a band-aid to relationship problems, especially when the couple is cohabitating. So, yes couples do need to be told to love each other even when they feel that the other is unlovable. Love is a choice and until you realize this and ACT, then you will continue to experience the same life issues over and over.
So, the first command of marriage is to love...even when you don’t want to, or if you feel the other person doesn’t deserve it or when you are angry or if you... - you fill in the blank. Love, just as life, is best managed one day at a time. Today, decide to love no matter the circumstances.
Jennifer Conner is a sassy love advocate who talks straight about the life and love challenges that wives in young marriages experience. She helps women go deeper within themselves in order to get deeper connected to their Honey. Jennifer shares the message of self-love through her coaching firm, The Marriage Effect®. Grab your FREE Love Swagger Guide that dishes out the skinny on how to have a deeper connection with your hubby at lovestartswithme.com.